"That's not very much time for planning!" Was my sister's comment when I told her that we were going to try for June (exactly 6 months away). My mother on the other hand said, "I won't put down any non-refundable deposits on a location until his final divorce papers are back (yes, the divorce from his ex is not yet final... don't ask). But... if you want my opinion, I think that you should get married in June. Your biological clock is ticking. And sometimes people move in and just never get around to getting married." Oh and yes - she said, "I want a son-in-law!" She likes John. I think she also said that he was a "keeper." I'm glad that my mother is excited. Even my sister seems excited. My sister stopped off at David's Bridal and tried on some bridesmaid outfits yesterday, before I'd even made my first bridal gown shop appointment. The report was that David's Bridal had cheep stuff and I wouldn't want to buy anything there. But she determined her sizes and the fact that anything she gets will need to be altered.
About 2 days ago panic set in. Do you know exactly what it takes to put on a classy wedding for 120 people in 6 months or less? Well, you don't want to know. I registered on "The Knot." It's a wedding website that has a very comprehensive "to do" checklist among other things. Before registering I paused. "How much email spam am I going to get when I sign up for this thing? Should I do it? They're going to send me email for every wedding-related promotional piece of crap that exists. I'm going to get spammed to the hilt. And there will be ads on every page. Brides must be the biggest and best target group to sell to. They're spending money on the wedding, on their wedding guests, on a honeymoon, on nesting in a new house, the list goes on. Sell, sell, sell. Buy, buy, buy. There is no end to the exchange of money for crap. And "The Knot" website is the right of passage to separating a bride from her family's money. I shouldn't sign up for the website. But I need a "to do" checklist and I'm not going to wait until I can buy a wedding planning book in a bookstore. I need the list NOW. I'm planning this wedding NOW. I only have 6 months! I don't even have 6 months! And this wedding is large and classy. I need to know what to do now! I signed up.
The first thing I learned is that you have to have "A Date." Even if you don't have A Date, you have to pick A Date. The Knot website makes you pick a date. You cannot sign up without it. That’s also the first question everyone asks when you say you are engaged. When is the date??? So I picked a date. June 24, 2007. There, I did it. Now we have “A Date.” I didn’t even ask John. Wow, it’s like a right of passage. You’re not really getting married until you’ve picked A Date. So, there. Now we are official. Maybe “The Date” will change. But that’s not important. Our entire relationship, our future, our existence is now reduced down to a single Date. Yes, we are getting married in June.
Sunday, December 31, 2006
We're Engaged!
He did it! He proposed! On December 20th, 2006.
It was magical. It was romantic. It was perfect. It was everything I ever dreamed of. Well, okay, maybe in retrospect it wasn't storybook perfect. I was crabby and cranky that morning. We drove to our vacation rental in Marshall (15 miles from Pt. Reyes Station), and when we got there I realized that the hot tub that was a requirement for choosing that particular house was not usable. John was so sweet. He had this very cute empathy for my disappointment over the hot tub.
John insisted that we walk on the beach before the sun set. So we did. I was obsessed with watching the seals in the ocean. We went out to some rocks that were closer to the water. I could only look a the seals. They were so cute. And there were so many of them.
While I was staring at the seals in the water John said (without much formality and in his very cute and informal manner) "Honey, will you marry me?" Apparently (now that I have just asked him to recount the event) he actually gave a little preamble speech in which he said, "You've saved my life. I can't imagine anyone making me happier. I love you so much. You've helped heal me and you make me a better person. We're a wonderful match, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, etc." But all I heard, or all I remember is "Honey, will you marry me?" We had fallen into the habit over the past couple months of saying and asking each other this all the time. So I didn't think that this was "IT." I replied with, "Of course honey - but look at how cute the seals are." Without even looking at him. So he asked again. When he asked a second time, I wondered why he was asking again. Then I looked at him and he had pulled a ring (a very nice ring!) out of his jacket pocket. I remember thinking that I couldn't believe it was actually happening. It was almost like I was denying myself the pleasure of the moment. And then I cried. And then I hugged him. And he went on with the "I love you and you are so wonderful for me speech." I took the ring and put it on. I was SO impressed that he had chosen a ring, a beautiful one, all on his own and had truly surprised me with this event. It was everything that I had ever wanted and dreamed of. I cried again. Then I was happy.
John suggested heading back to the house. But I wanted to make the moment last as long as possible. So we stayed on the rocks a little longer and basked in our happiness. I also had another look at the seals. Then sun kept setting and our shoes were wet and muddy. The beach was picture-perfect. And John was as sweet as ever. Apparently he said a million wonderful things to me in that moment out on the beach. But all I remember now is that he had to ask me twice if I would marry him and actually show me the ring before I understood exactly what was happening. Once I saw the ring I couldn't believe it. And after I put the ring on, I felt as if all was perfect in the world. How many moments are there in life when one actually feels like all is perfect in the world? At that moment, John made me feel that way.
It was magical. It was romantic. It was perfect. It was everything I ever dreamed of. Well, okay, maybe in retrospect it wasn't storybook perfect. I was crabby and cranky that morning. We drove to our vacation rental in Marshall (15 miles from Pt. Reyes Station), and when we got there I realized that the hot tub that was a requirement for choosing that particular house was not usable. John was so sweet. He had this very cute empathy for my disappointment over the hot tub.
John insisted that we walk on the beach before the sun set. So we did. I was obsessed with watching the seals in the ocean. We went out to some rocks that were closer to the water. I could only look a the seals. They were so cute. And there were so many of them.
While I was staring at the seals in the water John said (without much formality and in his very cute and informal manner) "Honey, will you marry me?" Apparently (now that I have just asked him to recount the event) he actually gave a little preamble speech in which he said, "You've saved my life. I can't imagine anyone making me happier. I love you so much. You've helped heal me and you make me a better person. We're a wonderful match, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, etc." But all I heard, or all I remember is "Honey, will you marry me?" We had fallen into the habit over the past couple months of saying and asking each other this all the time. So I didn't think that this was "IT." I replied with, "Of course honey - but look at how cute the seals are." Without even looking at him. So he asked again. When he asked a second time, I wondered why he was asking again. Then I looked at him and he had pulled a ring (a very nice ring!) out of his jacket pocket. I remember thinking that I couldn't believe it was actually happening. It was almost like I was denying myself the pleasure of the moment. And then I cried. And then I hugged him. And he went on with the "I love you and you are so wonderful for me speech." I took the ring and put it on. I was SO impressed that he had chosen a ring, a beautiful one, all on his own and had truly surprised me with this event. It was everything that I had ever wanted and dreamed of. I cried again. Then I was happy.
John suggested heading back to the house. But I wanted to make the moment last as long as possible. So we stayed on the rocks a little longer and basked in our happiness. I also had another look at the seals. Then sun kept setting and our shoes were wet and muddy. The beach was picture-perfect. And John was as sweet as ever. Apparently he said a million wonderful things to me in that moment out on the beach. But all I remember now is that he had to ask me twice if I would marry him and actually show me the ring before I understood exactly what was happening. Once I saw the ring I couldn't believe it. And after I put the ring on, I felt as if all was perfect in the world. How many moments are there in life when one actually feels like all is perfect in the world? At that moment, John made me feel that way.
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